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My husband is a pastor. As someone who works in the ministry field, a sabbatical is a common practice in his world. It’s also becoming more common in the corporate world for top-level executives and I think that’s an incredible shift in workplace culture.

Many of you might be unfamiliar with a sabbatical, so let’s break it down. The way I see it, a sabbatical has two elements:

Continue reading “Two Elements of an Effective Sabbatical”

Sometimes separation gives you perspective. I feel like we always think of the word separation with a negative connotation, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Sometimes, separation is the healthiest choice.

This is especially true when it comes to your work and business life. You simply cannot pour into your business from an empty cup. And that means you have to step away to fill yourself back up.

One time my husband and I were on a hike and a panic attack started to creep its way into my mind. I was starting to get pretty tired and I had no idea when we would come to the end of this particular trail. I remember going through all the options in my head as the anxiety continued to build… Would it be shorter to turn around and go back from where we came? If we kept going would the end of the trail be close? Maybe we should veer off on a different path that would get us there quicker? The panic started to overwhelm me.

I started going into “what if” mode. What if we are on a path that literally doesn’t end? What if we don’t get out before it gets dark? What if I trip and fall and hurt myself and we don’t know how long it would take help to get here? What if I have to go pee really bad and I do it by some poison oak? Oh yes, I went there.

The forest felt like it would never end, until the moment we hit the clearing. Once we arrived at the open space I was immediately relieved. In an instant, I went from completely riddled with fear to complete ease.

I remember having that exact same feeling in my business. I remember thinking this is never going to end – the bills, the late fees, the collector calls, the upset customers. It’s never going to end.

During this time I attended a leadership class. The speaker for that particular day shared how he takes a 3-day retreat to business plan each year. He went on to explain that those 3 days are non-negotiable in his business. In fact, it’s one of his first priorities at the beginning of every year.

As I sat there listening to him I was in complete disbelief. I actually remember thinking, “Wow – what a luxury. That will never be possible for me.” My list of reasons was seemingly endless – I can’t afford to be away from my store. I don’t have the extra time to do that. I don’t have the resources to do that.

What I soon came to realize was that all of those excuses were the very reason why I needed to adopt his practice – or something similar.

You see, I was in the forest. I had no idea when my crazy cycle was going to end and I needed to remove myself from that. The only way I could ever escape the crazy cycle was to take a step back and get an aerial view. I didn’t want to keep walking the path I was on, so I knew I needed to create one. Having an aerial view allowed me to see where I was going. It gave me hope. 

Over the next few weeks, I am going to cover the three things I believe must be on your calendar every year:

• Sabbatical
• Planning Retreat
• Vacation

Yep, ALL THREE. They have three very different purposes and they are planned and executed very differently. 

A Sabbatical makes you a better you. A planning retreat makes your business a better business and you a better owner. A vacation refreshes the soul and brings you back together with those you love most.

Does this just sound nice to you? Join me over the next few weeks as I dive into these three experiences and share exactly how to plan and execute each one so that you are a better you.

I am a bull-headed and stubborn person.  Maybe you can relate?

The nature of my thought process is pretty linear: have an idea, come up with a plan, and execute the plan. I like this process because there are no people involved, and there certainly isn’t a lot of thinking.

And although it is never my intention, this nature sometimes manifests itself as a bulldozer. I am certainly not proud of this, in fact, I absolutely hate when I do this. But I must acknowledge that it’s part of the way I’m wired, and I have to be willing to check myself. This bulldozer personality is something that I am working on. I am a work in progress!

When I almost tanked my business – like water got shut off at my house, tanked – I had a business coach. I knew that something had to change, and I mustered up the courage to admit that I didn’t know what needed to change.

The business coach I had hired was recommended to me and given my complete lack of knowning what to do next, hiring her seemed like a good place to start.

Well, guess what? She fired me.

Oh yes, you read that right. My business coach fired me. You might be wondering why…

I didn’t do the readings she recommended. I didn’t do the work that she asked me to do. The only thing I was consistent at was canceling our meetings last minute. I remember her telling me that she couldn’t want success for me, and  I have to want it for myself. I was so angry when she told me that. Did she even know me? No one could possibly want this more than I do. I wasn’t sleeping at night, I was constantly sick to my stomach, I had serious anxiety, and I was just plain stressed to the max. I wanted it more than anyone in the world. 

When she fired me, I didn’t understand why. How was cancelling our meetings because something came up at the store a bad thing? I was putting my business first.

Do you know what she asked me when I told her that?

“Are you? Are you putting your business first?”

Still, I didn’t understand (cough-cough, bull-headed). The relationship was over.

Now let me set the record straight… not one of my proudest moments.  

Eventually, it clicked. 

At some point in my first couple of years as a business owner, I had accepted the lie that by putting out fires and being a great sales person I was prioritizing my business. But friends, that is not true.

Prioritizing you business means growing yourself and investing in education. If I wasn’t sound I certainly couldn’t expect my business or my employees to be.

So one day, after months of keeping myself in an insanity cycle, I realized something. I was a horrible leader because I didn’t have a plan. The day-to-day of owning a business was so overwhelming that I didn’t even know where to begin. The simplest solution was to do nothing. As sick and uncomfortable as I was, it dawned on my that I was “safe” in my crazy cycle.

Terrifying.

It was time to make a change and step out of that insanity cycle that was sure to run me to the ground. My transformation began, and it happened in three phases…

EDUCATION

1. I didn’t just dive into education – I cannonballed in. 
2. I read so many books, signed up for a business coaching program, took a local leadership class, and subscribed to podcasts (which are free).
3. I met with mentors who were more experienced and wise.
4. I befriended local business owners and listened to their stories.

WORK

1. I translated all of the information that I had absorbed via education and applied it to my business. Bridal is its own little world, am I right?
2. I analyzed my findings and worked to understand how all of this information would impact my business.
3. I took action and figured out what worked in my store and what didn’t. This was hard, because…change is hard.

ENDURANCE

Flipping a 180 on your business doesn’t happen overnight. It’s not a magic pill and there is no rainbow to find your pot of gold. You will hit road bumps along the way. It might get a little bit worse before it gets better, but that doesn’t mean you quit. So here’s what you do next:

1. Track your time. Figure out if there are things that are sucking your time and could be delegated to other people.
2. Block your time. Put your education/ training/implementation activities on your calendar. Sharpie them in just like you would a really important meeting.
3. Stay focused. Don’t squirrel! Remember that it is important – maybe the most important thing.
4. Power through. You will get frustrated, you will get discouraged, you will want to quit. Don’t do it. 

Following these three steps made me feel like a business owner, not just someone who has a business.

Does any of this resonanate with you? Do you want to get off your own crazy cycle? If this bull-headed girl can do it, so can you.

I am so grateful that I can take everything that I have learned and package it up in a way that’s easy for bridal store owners to implement.

Oh. Celia, if you ever read this, I am so sorry that you had to fire me and that when you did I just didn’t get it. I am sorry for being an awful student. I am sorry for wasting your valuable time. I am sorry for not trusting your process. Thank you for firing me so that way I could keep going on my journey of figuring out this crazy thing called life and business!

Man, change is hard. We almost always push against change when it presents itself. Have you ever thought about why?

Are we really so afraid of change? Is there some ambiguous thing out there that just makes some people okay with change and others not ok with it?

I don’t think so. I believe in my gut that the fear of change comes down to one thing – not knowing how to deal with the feeling of overwhelm.

Do you resonate with any of these experiences?

• The heartburn that just won’t go away.
• The gut-ache that never seems to end.
• Laying in your bed every morning, willing your legs to move.
• That 10 a.m. brain fog… then again at 2 p.m. and 4 p.m.
• Sitting at your desk, staring… literally having no clue where to start.
• Tight muscles in your neck, back, and shoulders.

That, my friend, is the feeling of overwhelm. And change is an overwhelm catalyst. 

So instead of being afraid of change, which we now know leads to overwhelm, let’s put some tools in your box that enable you to handle overwhelm. 

But first, let me be honest…  I am not a natural master at this. Just like I learned everything that I teach in my Adore Your Business Avenues training, I learned how to overcome overwhelm because I had to get myself out of it.

Here are three simple steps to overcome your overwhelm…

1. Brain Dump Get all of your cards out on the table. Write anything and everything that’s on your mind on a piece of paper. Once it’s out of your head and onto the paper, keep it there until it’s the right time to focus on it.
2. Categorize the Dump Take all those things that you wrote down and categorize them. Which matters are so important that your business would be incredibly harmed if you didn’t handle them? Which ones are tasks – just things that need to be checked off a list? What are your next big ideas – the things that you want to do in your business but just don’t seem to have time for? Make sure everything you brain dumped is categorized into one of those three areas.
3. Prioritize Those things that could bring great harm to your business? Well, we’ve gotta start there. And all those tasks that just need to be checked off the list? Give them due dates and then work on them as they come due. And those big ideas? Well, they are out of your head and on paper and that’s probably where they need to sit for awhile. That’s okay!

Piece of cake, right? It really is, but it’s sticking with it that gets to be a little tricky.

We usually get a little hung up on step three, so let’s give that step a little more love.

1 Start with the Tasks 

Tasks are the least time consuming and the most specific. Sit down with a calendar and mark off time to accomplish each one. Checking things off your list will give you the energy to complete the long-term tasks!

2 Next, Tackle the Do-Or-Die 

I know these things are keeping you up at night, so let’s fix that. Take some time to analyze each situation and figure out what a solution would look like – this is no time for a band-aid. We are so quick to start “flailing”, which only puts the problem off for 4 months. No more of that.

These do-or-die problems are going to take more time than anything else because they deserve it. Invest in finding out the root of the problem and then go after it like your store depends on it (because it might).

3 The Big Ideas 

We love dreaming up our big picture ideas, don’t we? I know I have quite the pile of big ideas, but I’m good with that because I have a plan. All of my big ideas have been prioritized and dated accordingly. I try to tackle one big goal every quarter, and I know well in advance which ones are on the horizon.

This process allows me to focus entirely on the big idea that’s up because I know when I’m going to address the others. At this point, I can start assigning smaller tasks to the big idea at hand.

I hope this is helpful to you, but I know you might still be experiencing some pretty intense overwhelm.  Why don’t you hop on into my FREE Four Foundations to Profitability and Sustainability training? This week I am walking you through the journey of how I broke things down into a step by step process to turn my business around. I was on the brink of bankruptcy, but I’m proud to say that I am now running a highly profitable and sustainable business. In the Adore Your Business Hub, we are spending each day on one of the four foundations that turned my business around. Come on over and see what it’s all about – sign up HERE.